Throughout my summer, I have found myself constantly surrounded by kids. Whether it be babysitting, working at a summer camp, or walking through Target, I have picked up on the routines and tendencies of children, specifically their bad habits. Having been through those younger years alongside my peers, I see how the bad habits they cling onto can develop into bigger problems as they grow older. Talking back to adults can lead to a greater sense of defiance and rebellion. Bullying can lead to the idea of self-importance. Cheating in meaningless games can lead to entitlement, taking the easy way out, and cheating through business and relationships. Such small actions in the developing years, when repeated, result in a cheated life because of their presumed triviality.
This got me thinking. Here I am criticizing children for not realizing the significance of their bad habits, but I am only approaching my twenties. I am still in the developmental phase of life: finding myself and deciding who I want to be. I, too, have bad habits that I overlook for the purpose of laziness and I, too, need to change my ways to ensure a more fulfilled future. (If you are reading this telling yourself you do not need to worry about your bad habits, that is a bad habit in itself! Child developmental stage aside, you should always be trying to improve yourself, so isn’t your whole life a developmental process?)
Why do we hold onto bad habits when we know they are bad for us? In other words, what do they give us in the moment? They give us satisfaction. Each time we knowingly do something bad for ourselves, there is a temporary feeling of happiness. Overeating-eating junk food is a good example. Sure those seven cookies seem like a good idea in the moment. They taste good and you want them; yes, they will leave you satisfied. However, the problem with this satisfaction is that it is only temporary, and further results in disappointment, frustration, and resentment for your past choice. People nowadays, especially my generation, are accustomed to instant gratification. Therefore, we permit these bad habits because they leave us instantly satisfied. While it may be instant, bad habits can never leave us fully satisfied.
There is a way to address this, to receive lasting happiness and a more fulfilled life: develop good habits. As simple as this sounds, it is a lifetime commitment with necessary patience. The satisfaction is not immediate like with bad habits; neither is it evident. Instead, one morning after becoming accustomed to a life of good habits, you realize an underlying positivity in your everyday life; subtle but pleasing, this satisfaction leads to a more permanent happiness and wholesome existence.
Breaking the Habits
Overeating
One of the hardest bad habits to shake is overeating, especially if it is junk food. We all want to be happy, and food is something that makes us happy (there is a reason it is called “comfort food”). Some of the most comforting feelings in the world include eating a freshly toasted s’more surrounded by friends, eating buttery popcorn at the movies, and indulging on gas station soda and candy during a family road trip. These activities are all okay within reason, meaning they have to be limited. Think: How many s’mores is enough to make me happy, while I stay conscious of my sugar intake? Is one large popcorn for myself worth it? Maybe I do not need the Dr. Pepper, Twix, and Bugles. I find the problem with eating junk food is that once the initial satisfaction fades, all my brain can think about is getting more. This is why, with junk food, we continue eating after our meal/snack is finished. The satisfaction fades and we want more, so we try to get it back by continuing the action that gave it to us. It is only after four servings of Pop-Tarts that the thought dawns on us, “I just ate 800 calories of sugar and fat for a snack.”
Eating is an easy action to repeat, but it is hard to be happy with yourself by continuing to indulge on these little satisfactions. While pleasant in the moment, they later lead to possibilities of high cholesterol and obesity which can bring on mental issues like lacking self-confidence and increased self-hate. All of this can be avoided with the practice of making good food choices. This does not mean dieting all the time or even giving up the foods you love like s’mores, popcorn, and candy, but it means getting into the practice of regulating their intake, and choosing healthier options instead. There has been research that says it takes 21 times to make a habit stick, so choosing 21 healthy options instead of junk food will make a difference in your choices after that. I was on a strict paleo diet for 34 days, and a loose paleo diet for the next 30 days, and without a doubt, I see a difference in the snacking choices that I make. By habit, every snack I eat is a fruit or vegetable. If you are not ready to give up all the great snacks of the world, try cutting portion sizes down first. Get the small ice cream instead of the large, and do you really need all three toppings?
Binge-Watching Television
Binge-watching Netflix is one of the greatest new trends that the world has offered us. Believe me, I’ve done my fair share of staying up until morning watching episode after episode of my favorite show. At certain points in my life, I’ve thought back to what I did in the past week, and the answer has been nothing but eat, sleep, and watch TV — no reading, writing, crafting, shopping, hanging out with friends — only watching TV. While this realization is somewhat gratifying, knowing I have watched two seasons in six days, it is also disappointing for the same reason. Life should be about exploring new things beyond what next to watch on Netflix. While binge-watching may be fun, it is not the most efficient way to spend time. Instead of completely stopping my binge-watching, I chose to make it more productive. While watching Netflix, one thing I did was I worked for hours making the art and jewelry that I sell at my Etsy shop (visit here). Because I am selling these products, I considered this a job (watching TV and crafting — the easiest job ever!). This allowed me to still watch ten hours of TV at a time, but increased my crafting productivity because I then associated crafting with Netflix, and I wanted to keep watching Netflix, so I kept crafting. Another thing I added to my binge-watching routine was working out. This increased the amount of time that I worked out because mindlessly watching Netflix distracted me from the time on the elliptical, and an episode would fly by. Easing out of the binge-watching habit is easier taking it one step at a time. Start by incorporating something productive that you love, in my case crafting and working out, just do not incorporate food!
If you want to make a lifestyle change and quit binge-watching altogether, reading is a great substitute. Episodes are fashioned to leave watchers on a cliff-hanger every time, which is the reason we keep watching. Books are made in the same way, and will give you the same urge to continue after a chapter ends. I am currently reading Charlotte Brontë’s Jane Eyre, but 18th century British literature is not everyone’s cup of tea, so find a genre that suits you. Altogether, I recommend trying reading to substitute for binge-watching, but if binge-watching is too engrained in your daily routine, at least make it productive!
Spending Freely
I am both a saver and a spender. Since I got my first job when I was a sophomore in high school, I’ve put money into my savings account and never touched it. Also since then, I’ve mindlessly spent more money than I should have. I love treating myself and buying new clothes for no real reason. The problem with spending freely is that the satisfaction of buying something new fades and it becomes another piece of clothing in your closet after one wear; then, you pour more money into newer clothes to get that satisfaction back. Instead of wasting the money, set long-term goals for your savings account, like adding a certain amount of money each month towards a yearly goal. Reaching these goals is a more wholesome satisfaction because it is quantifiable proof of what you have worked for. Save this money for special occasions like taking a road trip, going abroad, or going to an amusement park. In other words, try to spend this money on experiences rather than material goods that will give only temporary happiness. The satisfaction of good memories will last a lifetime. But I still need money for my everyday life? What about that? In my opinion, the best way to split up a paycheck is saving the hundreds and living off the tens. For example, if my paycheck says $346, I would put the $300 into my savings account immediately, and pretend the paycheck was only for $46. I would then live off of that until my next paycheck. It is easier than it sounds when you learn to prioritize what you need and what you do not.
Skipping the Gym
Given the option, many people have a tendency to avoid hard physical work. No matter your age, weight, or build, improving yourself through physical fitness is a great way to keep yourself healthy. If you are one of those people who find it hard to get yourself started, I am the same way. One way that I have convinced myself to go to the gym is by dressing up for it. This will not work for some people who prefer to work out in sweats and unwashed hair (which is perfectly fine!) but what works for me is wearing my favorite leggings with my hot pink workout top and a cute headband. Wearing my favorite clothes gets me motivated to go to the gym. Working out is all about making yourself feel good, and looking good is a part of that. By dressing up, you are subconsciously telling yourself, “I already spent ten minutes dressing up for this, so I might as well make it a good one.” I have one challenge for people who find it hard to start: just get in the door. That is it. If you walk in, do ten crunches, and walk out, you are still doing more for yourself than you would be sitting on the couch. These ten crunches, with time, will develop into a full routine. Working out releases endorphins (oh, the things we learned from Legally Blonde) and endorphins make you happy. Therefore, it will give you both the immediate satisfaction and the long-term confidence. One quote I love is “work out because you love your body, not because you hate it.” Working out should be a treat to yourself, not a punishment. It helps immunity, heart health, sleep patterns, mental functions, controls weight, boosts energy, improves self-confidence, and makes you happy. In the words of Shia Labeouf, just do it!
Social Media
Social media is great in so many ways. It gives us ways to share products we like, see what our peers are up to, and a reason to stay connected with people we might otherwise never talk to again. I fully support social media, but the bad habit I am talking about is mindlessly refreshing every app for hours until something pops up. This is something people from my generation are very aware of and very accustomed to. When there is nothing to do, social media gives us a hundred options: Snapchat magazines, endless Pinterest and Facebook feeds, discover pages on Instagram, Twitter, stalking random accounts, and so on. Similar to my binge-watching argument, this time-wasting activity contributes little to our lives but takes up much of our time. Before you convince yourself that your screen time is fine, download the app “Moment” (not sponsored, download here). This app tells you exactly how much time you spend on your phone and how many times you pick it up each day. My worst statistics from the past two weeks are spending 4 hours and 47 minutes on my phone and picking it up 112 times, all while being aware this app was tracking my progress and while I was trying to limit it. All of this time was wasted where I could have been doing something more productive. One of the best ways this can be managed is by turning off notifications, especially for Snapchat. This will allow you to check your social medias on your time, and not when the app tells you to.
Not Praying
I have only recently begun praying on a daily basis, and it has given me an underlying comfort in my everyday life. It has strengthened my faith as well as given me a chance to organize my thoughts. In the past, I never sat down at the end of the day and thought about how my day went: breaking down the good and bad, thinking about who in my life may need help, and deciding how I could help myself. Prayer has given me a time for reflection at the end of the day where I can sort out what I am thankful for and decide what I need help with. It has helped me focus on what is important and what is not, and it gives me someone to talk to when I am alone. I have felt mentally healthier since I started because it has given me the opportunity to strengthen my relationship with God as well as assess how I am living my life, and how I can live it better. If you are not a religious person, I still recommend sitting down at the end of the day to sort out these thoughts. Journalism and meditating are good ways to help in this case — anything including quiet time for yourself to think.
Procrastinating
Procrastinating may seem like the easier option in the moment but the approaching due date causes stress and anxiety that can be avoided with the simple habit of staying organized. Take advantage of the notes and reminders apps on your phone and write down everything. From grocery lists to homework assignments to basic reminders, write it down. After that, organize it into goals of when you want each task completed by. Like noted above, try this for at least 21 days to make being organized a part of everyday life instead of a chore. Simply checking off a box of a task completed gives a small rush of happiness, with a greater satisfaction of a more organized life. Our minds are so full of information, and using an app or notebook to jot down tasks can help you stay organized and beat procrastination. In the end, there is more time to spend for yourself.
Conclusion
Developing good habits is hard. It will be a lifetime of growing and falling motivation, and frustration when things are not going well. I am no master at this — not even close. Last week I ate seven s’mores just because I wanted to, I still skip the gym, and I still spend more than three hours on my phone daily. The main cause of this is temptation. All of these bad habits are constantly in our face telling us “just once” when we know it will not stop at “once.” The challenge is convincing yourself to overcome these temptations by choosing a life of long-lasting satisfaction rather than immediate and temporary gratification. All of this is possible; you just have to start.
